Snap tells Loopin he will free him if he helps him kill Vampire, Draco and Ebony. He reveals if Ebony is killed the Dork Lord will never die. Draco also admits that he did it with Snap, but since Snap is a known 'ropeist', it doesn't count as sex.
Fearfully, our heroes get dressed. Suddenly, Satan changes into Voldemont and reveals he knew who Ebony was all along.
Nearly every other character from the story runs into the room.
Voldemort does a spell and his broom stick comes to him 'sexily'. He begins flying around. Harry casts a 'Cruciatus' spell and the car falls to the ground. Snap crawls out of it and picks up Ebony's video camera. He threatens to show the videos of Ebony naked and Ebony and Draco having sex to the whole school if she kills him (?). Ebony reminds him she has the picture of him and Loopin having sex in the empty hall while Dobby was watching.
Voldemort, still flying above them, calls everyone a "foolish ignoramus" and declares they shall all die soon.
Harry tells him to "think again you fukcing muggle poser!" and he, Navel and Voldemort take out black guns, forcing a Latin (actually Mexican) standoff.
Dumbledark begs Ebony to save them. She starts to cry, just wanting to watch movies and slit her wrists, but then points her wand at Voldimort and yells Abra Kedabra.